I was walking past the TV early this morning and a news feature spot of Sally, the robotic teacher, caught my attention. This human looking, android-like device can teach anything from kindergarten ABCs to college calculus and do it all for a mere fifty-nine grand investment cost! And as I hobbled a few steps trying to get the second leg in my pants, it hit me. We need Percy: the Parts Selling Partsoid! 

Think about it. A 24-7, 52 weeks of the year, no vacation or sick days, robotic parts manager. The only downtime would be for charging or maybe changing of a rare rusty rotator cuff. My Percy would have the dealer parts inventory in memory, along with all the supplier's inventory and locations. It could read barcodes, QR codes and have UPS/FedEx (FedUP) shipping information for order tracking on the daily lost package. Percy would have all the parts books in memory as well. He, or pronoun "it", would have customer equipment history and serial numbers galore. 

OK, so imagine a customer walks in and asks for a filter for his Hoyt-Clagwell. In a modern, run-on, android voice, it states "Mr. Jones, your tractor calls for a 34xt filter but two years ago you bought this part and then returned it because the serial number was wrong and you actually needed a 35yz. Now this is in stock on A8C. It is $19.99 and I have scanned the card in your wallet and emailed you a receipt to your private email so Mrs. Jones will not see what you are spending on this hobby. We have reordered and will have another on the shelf when you need it again two years from now." 

Percy is a parts selling machine! It also upsold the customer a radio, new seat, and charging station. Percy also has current parts programs that are downloaded daily from suppliers and with the efficiency of the greatest parts schools in the world; modified by the daily market report and political tariffs, he keeps my parts stock at optimal levels.

I have already fallen in love with my Percy.

Not only is it a parts gem, it also doubles as a night watchman, uh, "watch-bot". I can see it now; a pair of burglars break into the building and are preparing to heist a couple of Zero Turns when they meet Percy face to glowing LED face. Percy, in its best Clint Eastwood voice, tells them that on his left wrist is attached the most powerful laser in the world. It is capable at full charge of cutting steel bands off parts shipping pallets, cooking one's liver, or at low charge, giving the worst sunburn ever. "So, what will it be punk, do you feel lucky? Go ahead — make my boring day!" 

Now I know some of you are already in fear of lawsuits from an out-of-control patrolling Percy. Never fear, it has already generated AI image footage that was sent to the news outlets and police departments that would put reasonable doubt in any juror's mind.

You see, Percy will have it all. AI at its best — endorsed and repairable by every manufacturer except one, and coming to a dealership near you. Maybe.

'Til next time, keep smiling and selling....

Told from the perspective of an in-the-trenches owner/operator — Tim Brannon of B&G Equipment, Paris, Tenn. — Equipment Dealer Tips, Tales & Takeaways shares knowledge, experiences and tips/lessons with fellow rural equipment dealerships throughout North America. Covering all aspects required of an equipment dealership general manager, Brannon will inform, entertain and provide a teachable moment for current — and future — leaders within equipment dealerships.

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